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So you and your buddies want to join a mob of pitchfork weilding peasants who are planning on setting an old windmill on fire to rid the town of some sort of reanimated monster* -and you don't know what to wear. Well mein herr, this set of Authentic, Vintage, Traditional German Made, Bergfreund Suede Lederhosen is just the ticket for your next Polka Party or Bratwurst Bash, and with Octoberfest now ensconced as an ever-growing staple of American Suburban Multi-Culti European Assimilation they are all but essential (allowing that you have a size 32 waste or size 48 if you live in Europe and therefore have a legitimate reason for wearing these). I imagine that these were a souvenir from a Mid-Century Bavarian vacation, and probably never left the closet since being hung there 50 years ago. They are flawless, without any scuffs or requisite beer stains (hard to remove from suede). The leather straps, grey suede shorts and stag emblem are pristine; as is the zippered purse center strap (this is where you would keep your Deutsche Marks for your next round of Spaten Oktoberfestbier*).
*The preceding stereotypes, albeit regrettable, where good-natured in their intent and not meant to ignite any level of nationalistic indignation -and yes, I know that "Frankenstein" was set in Switzerland, but those dudes wore lederhosen too